She did it. Not once. But twice. I let her back in. I drank the kool-aid and I ended up getting burned twice. Sigh. Cynthia. Why do I even bother?
In my last post I mentioned a ghost that found her way back into my mind. She wanted to go to a strip bar last week. Of course when I messaged to confirm, she said I should have messaged earlier because she could not make it. Excuse.
She called me that night. We talked. She had been drinking. I should have known then, but I was swept away in fantasy by that damn accent of hers. She wanted to meet for lunch the next day. I wanted to sleep, but I gave in. I texted close to lunch time that morning. No response. I called. Ignored. I sent her a few texts letting her know that she hurt my feelings. No response.
This past Wednesday morning around 4am, I received a message from her. No apology. Just a picture of the restaurant she wanted to go to. I kept my answers short and to the point- “no”.
She’s an alcoholic.
It took minute, but I see that I’m person she calls on when she’s had one too many drinks and she needs let out her woes. She has no use for me when she’s sober.
I’ve learned that- she and her boyfriend, the cheating drug dealer, broke up. The deal she had to buy a new house fell through and now she is living month to month in an apartment she cannot afford on her own. To make ends meet she is going to marry some dude from Hungary for $35,000 so he can get a green card. She has a friend who transitioned from male to female who thinks she’s in love with her and an emotional mess most of the time. She also started going to AA and it’s not working because she goes to a bar right after.
It’s red flag central. I wish it were different because I really do like her, but I also like being somewhat free of any drama in my life and from our two phone calls I see that she is nothing but.